Responsibilities of
The Mother of The Groom

The mother of the groom is often at a loss as to exactly what role she plays in the marriage of her son. This is even more so when she has not participated previously in a wedding for a daughter or other sibling. The following rules of etiquette are shared to increase the joy and fulfill the traditional responsibilities of the mother of the groom.

The first rule of etiquette to be followed upon receiving news of the impending nuptials is to initiate contact between the families. Introducing yourself and your husband to the bride's parents is your first responsibility. This may be as simple as making a call to the bride's mother and telling her how happy you are about the engagement or an informal invitation to dinner at your home. If preferred, dinner at a nice restaurant is always in order. This may be with or without the couple in attendance. If the parents live far away, a friendly letter is appropriate. A snapshot of the family and maybe even one of the groom as a small child is always welcomed by the bride's mother and is a kind gesture.

1. It important to provide an accurate and timely guest list and stick to the guidelines given to you as to the number of guests you may invite. Remember to include zip codes.

2. It is the bride's mother who will first select a dress for her daughters wedding. A gown of complimentary color and similar styling is then chosen by the mother of the groom. Wear long if the bride's mother wears long or short if she wears short. The color should not match the bridesmaids, nor the brides' mother, but compliment both.

3. Reservations, for out-of-town guests invited by the groom's family, are the responsibility of the mother of the groom. It will be much more convenient if a block of rooms are reserved at a hotel near the home.

4. It is the responsibility of the groom's parents to host the rehearsal dinner. This can be as simple as a salad potluck with paper plates in the backyard or as elaborate as an exotic dinner with live entertainment in the finest restaurant. Everyone who takes a part in the ceremony is invited to the dinner. It is proper etiquette to invite the spouse or significant other of those participating and the parents of children in the wedding.

5. Scheduled family photographs prior to the wedding will dictate the groom's parent’s time of arrival. If photos are not scheduled to be taken before the ceremony, the arrival should be no less than one hour prior to the wedding.

6. As the wedding begins, the groom's mother will be escorted down the aisle, to the first pew, right-hand side, by the head usher or a groomsman who is a family member. A nice touch includes the groom escorting his mother down the aisle. As the groom's mother is escorted to her seat, her husband will follow along behind. However, if the parents are divorced, the father of the groom will have previously been seated two pews behind the mother’s pew.

7. The role as mother of the groom in the ceremony may include lighting the family candle on the altar, along with the mother of the bride. Family candles are lit after the candle lighters have left the altar area and prior to the entrance of the wedding party.

8. The first official duty of the mother of the groom during the reception is to stand in the receiving line greeting guests and introducing her friends and family to the bride and her family. Traditionally she stands between the bride and her mother. If the fathers of the couple choose to stand in the line, she will stand between them.

9. Be familiar with the responsibilities of the Maid of Honor. You may want to have a conversation with the Maid of Honor to coordinate and avoid stepping on each others toes.

Mother of the Bride Responsibilities

Wedding Expenses...Who Pays for What?

Best Man Responsibilities

Maid of Honor Responsibilities

Return from Mother of the Groom back to Wedding Etiquette

Return from Mother of the Groom to The Christian Wedding Planner