How Wedding Traditions Began

Many of today’s wedding traditions that we see during the ceremony and reception can be traced back to ancient Egyptian and European customs. They were often based on superstition, folklore, symbolism and religious beliefs. The origin and usefulness of some of these popular traditions are not always clear, but we have accepted them and continue to practice them just the same. The word “wedding” comes from the Anglo-Saxon word “wedd” that meant a man would marry a woman and pay the bride’s father. In ancient Greece, the bride’s age was computed from the day of her marriage, not from her date of birth!

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“Something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue and a lucky sixpence in your shoe” is an old familiar wedding poem. Each item in this poem represents a good-luck token for the bride. If she carries all of them on her wedding day, her marriage will be happy. "Something old" symbolizes continuity with the bride's family and the past. "Something new" means optimism and hope for the bride's new life ahead.

"Something borrowed" is usually an item from a happily married friend or family member, whose good fortune in marriage is supposed to carry over to the new bride. The borrowed item also reminds the bride that she can depend on her friends and family. The color blue has been connected to weddings for centuries. In ancient Rome, brides wore blue to symbolize love, modesty, and fidelity. Christianity has long dressed the Virgin Mary in blue, so purity was associated with the color. Before the late 19th century, blue was a popular color for wedding gowns, as evidenced in proverbs like, "Marry in blue, lover be true."

And finally, a silver sixpence in the bride's shoe represents wealth and financial security. A sixpence is a coin that was minted in Britain from 1551 to 1967. It was made of silver and worth six pennies. So this wedding tradition is definitely English, and many sources say that it began in the Victorian era.

It may date back to a Scottish custom of a groom putting a silver coin under his foot for good luck. For optimum fortune, the sixpence should be in the left shoe. These days, a dime or a copper penny is sometimes substituted, and many companies sell keepsake sixpences for weddings.

More Wedding Traditions

Why does the bride wear white? Since ancient times white has stood for happiness and joy. In later years, white worn by the bride stood for purity. It still to this day reminds us of joy and happiness. Today brides are known to wear white as well as colorful wedding gowns.

Why does the father give the bride away? In the past when women had few personal rights, the father of the young bride literally gave his daughter to the groom in exchange for some type of monetary gain. Today the father walks the bride to the alter as a symbol of blessing and support of the marriage. The officiate will ask ‘who gives this woman to be married to this man?’ Typically, the father says ‘her mother and I’. This is viewed as a sign of trust and affection from the parents to the new husband.

Why do we exchange wedding rings? The unending circle of the wedding ring has been a symbol of everlasting love between the bride and groom since the early days of the Egyptians. Romans made rings of iron as a symbol of the permanence of marriage. Primitive brides wore rings made of rushes or hemp which had to be replaced often. In Christian faith, the ring also symbolizes the unending bond of marriage between a husband and wife that in “what therefore God has joined together, let no man put asunder”, Matthew 19:6.

Why does the bride wear a veil? In ancient societies marriages were usually arranged by the families with the bride and groom never meeting until after they were married. On the big day the brides face was concealed with the veil and the groom was allowed to lift the veil only once the wedding concluded. Early Greek and Roman brides wore red or yellow veils to represent fire and to ward off evil spirits. The veil is mentioned in the Old Testament of the Bible when Jacob was tricked into marrying Leah instead of Rachel as she was wearing a veil which concealed her face. Nowadays brides wear wedding veils to make a fashion statement and to achieve a complete look with the wedding gown.

Why does the bride have bridesmaids? Early brides and her bridesmaids dressed in similar dresses in order to confuse the evil spirits.

Why does the bride stand to the left of the groom? Long ago the groom needed to keep his right (and sword) hand free to defend his bride and himself from attack and capture by jealous rivals.

Why is the ring worn on the third finger of the left hand? Prior to the 5th century the ring finger was actually the index finger. Later it was believed there was a vein in the third finger of the left hand that ran directly to the heart. The ring was placed on that finger to signify the heartfelt commitment to each other.

Why does the bride toss the bouquet? In ancient times it was believed that a bride was especially lucky on her wedding day. Guests would sometimes tear at her dress for a souvenir piece of good luck to take home. The bride’s tossing of her bouquet grew from her desire to offer a good luck souvenir and prevent guests from bothering her at her reception and tearing her dress.

Why does the groom wear a tuxedo? Before the 20th century the groom simply wore his “Sunday best”. It is said that President Teddy Roosevelt popularized the modern tuxedo.

Why do we call it “tying the knot”? In the days of the Roman Empire the bride wore a girdle that was tied in knots. The groom untied the knots prior to the consummation of their marriage.

Why do we have wedding cakes? During the days of the Roman Empire, cakes were made of wheat or barley. At the reception they were broken over the bride’s head by the groom as a symbol of her fertility. Guests would scramble to pick up pieces of the cake and take them home for good luck. During the middle ages it became a tradition for the bride and groom to kiss over a stacked tower of cakes without knocking them down. Later a clever baker added icing and the modern tiered wedding cake was born. One tradition is that a bride who keeps a piece of her wedding cake will have a loving and faithful husband. The most commonly known of wedding traditions regarding the wedding cake is that of saving the top tier until the couple’s first anniversary.

Why a groom’s cake? In the 1800’s the wedding cakes were fruit cakes (before baking powder, baking soda, etc.) and this tradition was brought to the United States with the Pilgrims from England. After white cake became available, the fruit cake tradition became known as the groom’s cake. It was placed beside the bride’s cake and later cut and boxed for the guests to take home. The cake is symbolic of fertility and abundance. There was a superstition that a lady who slept with a slice of the groom’s cake under her pillow would dream of her future husband. Today, groom’s cakes can be any type of cake; they are often chocolate cakes or cakes shaped or designed to some theme in the groom’s life. The wedding tradition of the groom’s cake seems to be most prevalent in the southern part of the United States.

Why do brides give wedding favors? Giving guests favors and mementos at the reception dates back to a 16th century custom in France. This wedding tradition was usually reserved just for royalty, with gifts being of great value such as precious stones, gold, porcelain, etc. Of course not everyone can afford these types of gifts so, as the tradition became common among all of society, gifts such as glass, confections, etc. were substituted.

Why do guests toss rice at the couple? Believing that newlyweds brought good luck, guests used to shower them with nuts and grains to insure a bountiful harvest and many children to work the land. During years of poor harvest, rice was tossed instead. This wedding tradition continues today with rice or birdseed to wish the bride and groom much happiness. When rice or birdseed is not permitted, bubbles are blown or bells are given to guests to ring when the couple departs.

Why do we call it a ‘honeymoon’? Many of the first marriages were by the man capturing his bride, not by her choice. When a man felt it was time to take a bride, he would often carry off the unwilling woman to a secret place where her family would not find them. They hid from her searching relatives while the moon went through all its phases and drank mead which was an alcoholic brew sweetened with honey. This affected both sobriety and increased the acidity of the womb which was thought to increase fertility. That’s where the word “honeymoon” is thought to have come from.

Why does the groom carry the bride over the threshold? When the groom used to steel his bride from her tribe, he would carry her kicking and screaming. This act has evolved into a more romantic gesture, welcoming the bride into her now home.

I'm not sure all of these wedding traditions are true, but they are fun to read.

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